So, I’m writing this post. I thought I couldn’t. Well, there were so many things in this life that I thought I couldn’t, but still. And there were those things I thought that wouldn’t, and still would, because The Big Guy’s got me. He always did.
This was a week of good and bad feelings. Good, in a sense that I’ve gotten through Chapter 14! There’s a DVPit coming this October! I’m making my way through this manuscript and I’m planning to hire a copyeditor! Yes! Exclamation points! And I haven’t a lot of money!
But having is where it starts, right? And for anyone to reap, they must sow.
I’m sowing where I want flowers to grow.
I want them to grow in words.
Tonight, a client emailed me and told me they’re terminating my services. Not that I was bad at it. They’re rearranging their company’s marketing strategies and it’s just unfortunate I’m not part of the plan.
Sometimes, we’re not always part of the plan.
But that’s not why I’m writing this blog post. Come to think about it, there were many jinxes this week. I was supposed to work on a really nice project but the client backed out, for some reason. Yes, bummer. But God will never leave us empty.
Maybe He just wanted me to loosen my grip on whatever’s in my hands so He could fill me with more things.
I’m all about that!
The truth is, I want to ease up my schedule so I could focus on writing, finish my manuscript and prep it up for the Fall DVPit. Which, by the way, I’m not really having sky-high hopes. But I shot myself in the foot the first time I submitted my queries, and this time, I just want to be ready. And frankly, I can do this again next year. Same book. I just want to get Fifth and El out there. I love them so, so much and they lived inside the back of my head for what, 10+ years, to be shut off forever. No way.
The rule of life is to give and take
I’ve always been taking. That’s not a secret. I’ve always been hiding something else in the spaces between my fingers because I love having. I enjoy it. But this time, life calls me to give, even though it slowly, slooowly takes a few things away, one by one. And all I wish, God, really, is to be always thankful. To be like the earth. The seed. The death of the shell and the sprouting of a new life.